Doctors in a Pissing Contest ...

An Israeli doctor says, 

"Medicine in my country is so advanced 

that we can take a kidney out of one man, 

put it in another, and have him looking for 

work in six weeks."

 A German doctor says, 

"That is nothing; we can take a lung 

out of one person, put it in another, and 

have him looking for work in four weeks."

A Russian doctor says. 

"In my country, medicine is so advanced 

that we can take half a heart out of one 

person, put it in another, and have them 

both looking for work in two weeks."

  An ILLINOIS doctor, says.

 "You guys are way behind. 

We recently took a man with 

no brains out of ILLINOIS , 

put him in the White House 

and within SIX MONTHS, 

half the COUNTRY is looking for work."

Hat/Tip to Andrew33 @ The K.O.O.K's Manifesto

Where Can I Get One Of These ?

Game Boy Girl

(Thanks DAN)

My New Truck

I bought a new Chevy Avalanche and returned to the dealer yesterday because I couldn't get the radio to work.

The salesman explained that the radio was voice activated.

'Nelson,' the salesman said to the radio.

The radio replied, 'Ricky or Willie?'

'Willie!' he continued and 'On The Road Again' came from the speakers.

Then he said, 'Ray Charles!', and in an instant ' Georgia On My Mind' replaced Willie Nelson.

I drove away happy, and for the next few days, every time I'd say, 'Beethoven,' I'd get beautiful classical music, and if I said, 'Beatles,' I'd get one of their awesome songs.

Yesterday, some guy ran a red light and nearly creamed my new truck, but I swerved in time to avoid him.

I yelled, 'Ass Hole!'

Immediately the radio responded with, "Ladies and gentlemen, the President of the United States Barack Hussein Obama and played “Hail to the Chief’

Damn I love this truck...

The Season's Over ... But Hey

Really ... More Bumper Stickers ? #3

Authors Note ... I've heard callers to radio shows

voice their objection to some Republicans. They

want to form a third party come election time.

Do your best to change the party within, and drop

the idea of a third party. You'll only split the vote

giving the Dems an easy ticket to Washington.

What's That Noise ?

A Comment Left At Jim McMahon's Blog

Here is a comment left at Jim McMahon's blog by a very angry Liberal.

I'm posting it here, in its entirety, with Jim's permission. This guy is

so full of hate. I'm also putting a link back to Jim's post here.

H.T. / JIM McMAHON - CHICAGO

Comment as follows :

John King said... Never been to your site before. I thought you were maybe Jim McMahon, former Bears quarterback. Wow, what a disappointment. My thoughts on you and your sad little diatribes here:

1) You are a real asshole, and a complete fucking joke of a man. Your tough guy shtick is very much lost on me and probably anyone with half of a brain. Did you go to high school? Can you do arithmetic in your head? Patriot Guard? American Grand Jury? Are you fucking kidding me? Are you fucking serious? Saturday Night Live couldn't make up shit that was more ridiculous. You guys actually get together and do stuff under these umbrellas? What a giant circle jerk for a bunch of reactive nutjobs. I hope you guys have a great time at your little jagoff meetings. Sounds like a lot of fun.

2) You are a disgrace to the fine City of Chicago, and the great United States of America.

3) Take your racist head and shove up all three generations of your doubtlessly horrid and equally racist family history. Oh right, you're not racist. You think anyone's buying that shit you're selling? Your racism is thinly veiled at best, and horribly atrocious at worst. With your name I am presuming you are Irish, like myself. Do you not realize that your own people were subjected to the same hatreds that you now project upon the President of our own country? Do you know what a mick is? A narrowback? A Paddy? That's you, pal. Just a hundred years removed. You'd think white people would get over their fear of black people at some point. Many or most have. You instead have decided to stockpile firearms and breathe hatred, the hatred of 400 years of oppression on our soil. You sad little man. Oh right, you're not racist. Sorry.

4) Barack Obama is a thousand times the man you ever wish you could be. I'm no huge Obama supporter, but give me a fucking break. You think you have anything to say about Barack Obama that matters? I wouldn't dare say half this shit that you say about a man clearly superior in intellect and accomplishment. How many classes you teach at University of fucking Chicago? How many political offices have you held? Have you ever even been to Washington DC? Oh wait - the NRA Christmas Cruise doesn't stop in DC anymore. For parity's sake, other similar men of equal note include John McCain and Mitt Romney. I am no partisan hack. I just respect men when they deserve it. You sir have no such respect and deserve the same lack of respect in return.

 

6) It is very frightening that you are a member of an organization so vital to the public health. I hope that your more deserving and certainly more human Fire Department colleagues don't decide to leave you behind in a burning building one day. I herald all things great about the City of Chicago, including our brave and valorous Fire Department. But even such a grand organization will contain losers, apparently. You are one such loser, sir. I feel sorry for you.

7) Keep on keeping on. "People" like you provide the entertainment I need to keep laughing through this wonderful life I have. Needless to say that life was given to me by my parents - and not by any god that you propose to believe in. You moron.


-John King, 29 years old
Chicago, IL
johnwking -AT- gmail -DOT- -COM-